#OpeEd: Let’s talk about Rape by Joel Oseiga Aleburu; @JoelOseiga.

I woke up planning to write about my weekend trip to Abuja and about how the sole of my shoe removed at a park in the middle of town only to see a tweet by an on air personality blaming rape on indecent dressing on the part of the ladies. I am just mad right now! So why not let’s discuss RAPE! The truth about RAPE is you never know how delicate and sensitive the matter is until someone you love experiences it. The story of the girl that was gang raped by five boys in ABSU made news both nationally and internationally years ago. What was her offence? She insulted one of the boys. We live in a cruel world but the truth is the Nigerian society encourages rape!

You don’t go about blaming rape on a girl that dressed “indecently”! Come to think of it, decent dressing is relative! There is no world known standard for what dresses are decent! The issue shouldn’t be “them rape you! Watin you wear??” Most people who get raped end up wallowing in silence because of the stigmatization attached. Nobody wants to hear her side (Does she even have a side in the first place?) ! Let me share a story I read some time ago.

#Op-Ed: Why the Fuss about Gender Equality? by Laz Ude Eze (@donlaz4u)

 

 

Seven years ago while on call duty at the University of Abuja Teaching Hospital, I had a female patient

referred from a general hospital on account of poor progress of labour. The labour had lasted for more

than 12 hours and we observed signs of obstruction on examination. The woman was weak and the

baby was in distress; a decision of assisted delivery through caesarian section was reached. After

counselling, the woman verbally agreed but the written consent was to be given by the husband. Yes,

you read me right – the husband. The man had a different opinion, his pastor had “prophesied that his

wife would deliver like a Hebrew woman”; so he declined consent. He later bowed to pressure after

hours of marathon counselling and signed the consent form. The operation was successful, but the baby

had signs of brain damage. During post natal care, the woman had started leaking urine from her vagina

(known as vesico-vaginal fistula – VVF). She would have to go through another surgery to repair her

leaking bladder. The baby was at risk of having cerebral palsy which is usually associated with

suboptimal motor function and low intellectual capacity. This pathetic incident can only occur in a

society like ours where women are denied the right to make informed decisions on matters concerning

their body and their health. 

It is no longer news that a week after the celebration of International Women’s Day, the Nigerian Senate

rejected a proposed legislation that seeks to promote equal rights and opportunities for women. The

official title of the bill was “A bill for an Act to Incorporate and enforce certain provisions of the United

Nations Convention on the Elimination of all forms of Discrimination against Women (CEDAW), the

Protocol of the African Charter on Human and People’s Rights on the rights of women in Africa, and

other matters connected therewith, 2016 (SB. 116)”. This decision of the Senate has received knocks

from well-meaning and informed Nigerians. Is it not ironic and hypocritical that the senate refused to

approve a bill drawn from international conventions which the country had signed and agreed to? Is it

not vexatious and insensitive that this happened while Nigerian women are discussing how to guarantee

rights and welfare of women globally at the ongoing meeting of the UN Commission on the Status of

Women in New York? 

Press Release: Violence against Persons Prohibition Bill (#VAPPBill) – A Call for Presidential Assent by #Choice4Life Advocates

25th May, 2015

After a thirteen-year sojourn at the National Assembly, the Violence against Person Prohibition (VAPP) Bill was passed by the Senate on 5th May, 2015. It was earlier passed by the House of Representatives on 14th March, 2013. While the bill awaited legislative action, thousands of Nigerians fell victim to various forms of violence and many lost their lives. Now that the bill has been passed by both chambers of the national assembly, harmonized and transmitted to the president, we call on President Goodluck Jonathan to further pen his name in the history books by assenting to it immediately.

Sexual violence, a crime the VAPP bill seeks to address appears to be on the rise in recent times.  Adolescents and youths, particularly young girls are the main victims of this form of violence. Unfortunately, 52% of victims do nothing about it (National Demographic Health Survey 2013) due  to minimal support structure on ground. Domestic violence, female genital cutting, electoral violence, and many others have also caused tremendous damages in our national polity.

Troubled by the sufferings of these victims who hardly ever get justice or support, the #Choice4Life  advocates, a group of young Nigerians from diverse ethno-religious and professional backgrounds joined the advocacy for the passage of VAPP bill into law. For the past 13 months that we led the #Choice4Life campaign via social media, television and radio, we observed a high acceptance of thebill by Nigerians.

Opinion: Rape and a Few Underlying Issues by @AAABORODE

There is no justification for rape, but we can achieve a significant plus when we cut off 

the extreme indecent dressing rampant nowadays. It is also a significant tool used by the 

perpetrators / rapists to cower their victims into believing it was their fault.

The sudden increase in the number of rape cases in recent times is not just alarming but scary! We are fast becoming regular victims of mentally derailed predators and the war seem like it’s just getting started.

The act of rape isn’t humane; and I see it as an act carried out by people with very low self-esteem and very sad lives. Unfortunately ladies and children are the major victims of these atrocious acts; they are subjected to the forceful act and end up being psychologically damaged for most parts of their lives.

Rape has resulted in cases of abortion, death of many either by suicide or murder and it has sent many to psychiatrist homes. It has aided the spread of sexually transmitted infections and paralyzed the dreams of many. Our environment hasn’t been just to the victims of these barbaric acts.

The victims, in most cases have been left to live in fear and turmoil. They have been made to look like outcasts and their burden has been derided as ‘normal’. We as a people need to understand that no one deserves to be raped and we should help these victims fight the war. The dangers of not helping are countless and it may end up knocking on your door if you think it hasn’t gotten to the grave end yet.

Joke Gone Wrong: The Tale of Comedian Akpororo

Hello everyone,

Hope we are still having a wonderful Easter break.

Just yesterday, a well respected Nigerian comedian and Airtel Ambassador, Akpororo told a rape joke at the ‪#‎AYLive2015‬ comedy show in Lagos. it won't be out of place to state that he is also a 'Gospel artist.' Interesting isn't it? Fola (@4LaH), a STER Ambassador who was present at the event confirmed the joke that was made, which a twitter follower has confirmed to be true.

The joke:

"He said he was traveling in a bus and saw a girl in the same bus. He was trying to ask her out but she didn't agree. Armed robbers stopped them, collected all their valuables and asked him to strip. Then they pointed a gun at the girl and asked her to strip too. Then they ordered him to have sex with her from behind at gun point. Then he started rolling his waist suggestively and the audience was laughing. He even said at the end have enjoyed it so much he started saying thank you to the armed robbers."

Though the joke was distasteful, what was most surprising is the laugh that pervaded the air. People found it funny. When did abuse become something society will accept via comedy and not accept in reality. Just thinking, will this be thesame people who will join a movement or go on radio and TV to denounce this act? Are these thesame kind of celebrity that will say "I stand to End Rape" in public? Hypocrisy mustn't be celebrated.

We believe telling a joke isn't just about making people laugh, it's people convictions. It also to a large extent determines who the person is and what they stand for. Can you catch an Ali Baba doing a rape joke? We doubt it! There is difference between CLASS and CRASS!

When people tell jokes that promote rape, society should frown at and refute this. There is little or no difference between someone who rapes and the one who tells the story in a way that one will feel comfortable with. Until we begin to understand that we have the power to determine what we listen to and judge as right or wrong, rape jokes will keep flying through our social media and public space.

Rape shouldn't be told to suit an audience. It can be told to touch people's conscience and deter others from indulging in the act.

At Stand to End Rape Initiative, we say NO to ‪#‎Rape‬ Jokes in Nigera and Africa as a whole.

We hope the comedian Akpororo will publicly apologise and moving forward, will desist from such an act.

Marital Rape in #Nigeria: My Perspective by Oluwatoyin Ogungbayi

Rape is one, if not the most under-reported and consequently under-prosecuted violent crime. Whether perpetrated by a stranger, an acquaintance or an intimate partner; it produces the most disappointing outcomes if prosecuted. Rape cases are often grueling, emotionally daunting for the victim, a crime of immense cruelty, which demands an enormous emphasis on proof in a court of law.

A quick examination of what rape is:

Rape is anal, oral or vaginal sex without consent. Therefore non-consensual anal, oral or vaginal penetration by a person’s spouse is marital or spousal rape.

Discussions around Marital Rape are guarded, sensitive and often unconcluded in the minds of many. Indeed in some societies some are of the position that it is culturally impossible to accuse a man of raping his wife. The popular belief is that spouses-especially the wife belongs to her husband and he can do as he pleases when he pleases and how he pleases so much so that it is unthinkable to suggest that a husband can rape his wife.

I however beg to differ by emphasizing the fact that the most crucial element of rape is the absence of consent. The relationship between the perpetrator and the victim does not take precedence over this ultimate factor of consent. Does it not therefore follow that lack of consent in marriage is rape? Rape remains rape as long as lack of consent is an element and Marital Rape is a despicable reality that affects a fair share of women whether or not it is spoken about and acknowledged.

Examining Martial Rape in the Nigerian context, we must understand the integral role power plays. Powerlessness for women and power for men is portrayed in Marital Rape because power gives the perpetrator the privilege of control of the victim’s body, absolute control to take, regardless of the victim’s willingness. It is used to punish, exert control over the victim and prove masculinity. This control is given, sustained and strengthened by patriarchy. Given that the society is an enabler of the rape culture through power and the dominance of men in the private and public spheres, it follows that a marital rapist believes that he owns his wife, a property that can be used anytime he pleases however he pleases; he believes also that sex is owed him by his wife. The prevalence of child marriage clearly depicts this unequal power relations and the way marital rape is enabled by the society. This sense of entitlement by marital rapists renders consent null and may be an indication that such men through socialization can also commit stranger rape. If so, the society can indeed be more dangerous for women than we thought.

Raped TWICE! First by a Perpetrator, Second by a Doctor. Zainab Brown (@AdunniBrown) Speaks

(Photo credit: The ViewsPaper)

The second rape I’m referring to in my title is not literal assault by a ‘doctor’ but more so an emotional and mental assault of a sexual assault survivor seeking help from doctors, lawyers and other systems providers. And most times, their friends, families and community members.

Sexual assault is perhaps the only crime in which its victims are victimized first by their attackers and second by legal, medical, and mental health systems (i.e. lawyers, psychologists and nurses) and even members of their communities. This secondary victimization or even “second rape” prohibits survivors of rape1 from thoroughly recovering and in addition perpetuate the idea that a rape survivor, male or female (although statistics show that women are succumbed to rape more than men), is to blame rather than the attacker. Campbell and Raja (1999)2 define secondary victimization as behaviors and attitudes of social service providers that are "victim-blaming" and insensitive, and which traumatize victims of violence who are being served by legal, medical, and mental health systems. This “second rape” by those meant to support survivors, in turn trivializes the crime and results in apathetic and discriminating attitudes towards sexual assault survivors.

#Give2STER Press Release.

For Immediate Release

September 16, 2014
The #Give2STER Campaign promotes an end to sexual violence and abuse.

Stand to End Rape (S.T.E.R) Initiative works to end all forms of rape through education, supporting victims of rape and changing community perceptions towards sexual violence and abuse. S.T.E.R provides awareness seminars, sexual violence and abuse education, peer mentoring, therapy and promotes sexual and reproductive rights.

The “#Give2STER” campaign is an opportunity for everyone to say no to sexual violence and abuse in our communities, and take a pledge to support the campaign. The campaign is aimed at starting a free self-defense class for children and young adults, visit schools to distribute preventive materials on sexual violence and also to have a rape intervention centre in Lagos (and across Nigeria).

Throughout the coming weeks, S.T.E.R will be sharing information on how you can do your part to promote the campaign.

Follow STER’s Twitter handle: @standtoendrape for campaign updates, ways to donate and opportunities to join the campaign.

The #Give2STER campaign, which is STER's first official fundraiser starts today and culminates on October 4th by 8 p.m.

You can donate to STER’s bank account:

Account Name: Stand To End Rape Initiative

Account Number: 0157148304 (Cooperate Account).

Bank: GTBank

You can also visit http://standtoendrape.org/ or call +2348095967000 for more information, updates on the campaign and ways you can participate on October 4th!

-End of release-

The Civil Society and the War against Domestic Violence by Bunmi Olaniyan

Within the last couple of weeks a lot of occurrences from the mundane to patently mind blowing has been scrolling across our collective, from continued Bringbackourgirls hash tag campaign for the Chibok girls to be rescued by Government to the comedy of the absurd playing out amongst our morally fractured political class.

Presently the 30percentornothing hash tag campaign is trending with a wide and varied series of emotional response. Some irritated others angry, while some offered whole hearted support and enthusiasm and those in between..

However apart from the frustration and anger at the perceived complacency of Government as regards a whole raft of issues, none of the news has caused as much angst and exasperation as the tweets bordering on an incident of domestic violence I read about barely few minutes ago. Since information about this particular issue is just unfolding hence we are not privy to the facts surrounding it this piece will suffice with one of equal impact hence assessment.

A couple of months ago, the flamboyant ex lawmaker Dino Melaye's partner packed out of his house due to her inability to withstand Dino's regular violence upon her person.

Was it My Fault? Self-Blame and Survivors

Was it my fault?

This is one common question. It should really come as no surprise that survivors blame themselves; it seems that society only takes rape seriously when the victim was violently overtaken by a stranger jumping out of the bushes. For most of us, our rapists were wolves in sheep’s clothing. They were our dates, our friends, our teachers, our cousins or fathers or mothers or husbands.

In Nigeria as we all know, most survivors tend to shy away from the incident and choose to keep mute. Based on findings, only 2 in 15 rape cases are reported and as little as 0.3% of the accused rapists are convicted. When the courts aren’t placing responsibility where it belongs, it becomes even harder for society to see us as victims whose actions played no role in what happened. And, therefore, it becomes even harder for us as survivors to realize that we are not to blame.

Did my choice lead to my rape?

We make hundreds of choices each day. Some are clearly good (wearing our seatbelt) and some are more neutral (eating potato chips for lunch instead of an apple). But some choices we make end up being bad only because of an intervening factor. For instance, one day last summer I parked outside instead of in a covered garage, on a day that happened to bring a huge hailstorm, and my car sustained expensive damages. "How stupid," I thought. "If only I had parked in the garage." What a bad choice I made!

Save a Girl, Save a Nation By Emeka D. Azubuike

The issue of building a strong, viable and peaceful nation is one major clamor in our present world order; and for it to be said that a nation is working to a certain level, every sector or  challenge must be overcome. Some areas must be put into full consideration and attention in  measuring the viability of nations. One of such area is the security of citizens especially those who have limited ability to protect themselves like our girls and women.

Gender Based Violence is one menace that is prevalent in our society yet given little attention.  The differential a classification of women in the society as against men has made it possible for them to experience such acts of violence and discrimination. Such acts ranging from domestic violence, girl child trafficking, child labour, rape, assault, deprivation of education, child marriage, genital mutilation and many more that are not known to the society.

Let Love Into Your Hearts Again. R.I.P #Aluu4

I recall the horror washing over me when I watched the #Aluu4 video over a year ago.

I recall the helplessness on their faces as they were dragged and beaten and mocked and tortured by a mob.

I recall the hope in their eyes that perhaps, just perhaps, a miracle would occur and ONE person would step in and save them.

I recall the painfully outstretched hands pleading for mercy and begging for their lives to be spared.

I recall the rage, venom and madness that overtook the murderous crowd as they pummeled these young men to death.

I recall imagining what their parents would go through, knowing “fellow Nigerians” murdered their children in cold blood.

Update: Lebanese Man Who Kicked Pregnant Employee in the Stomach Has Been Arrested

We reported some days back that President Jonathan ordered for the investigation of the case of a Lebanese boss, who abused his Nigerian employee (read HERE). This is an update of the situation.

The Lagos State Police Command on Friday arrested Kaveh Noine, a manager with Yoppan Printing Company, for allegedly kicking his pregnant subordinate, Alexandra Ossai, in the stomach. The incident which occurred 2 weeks ago was said to have caused the loss of the victim’s pregnancy.

It was reported that Noine -- a Lebanese -- reportedly travelled out of the country when policemen attached to the Area F Police Division, initially went to the company to invite him for questioning on Tuesday.

The President Orders for An Investigation of the Case of Pregnant Factory Worker Beaten by Lebanese Boss

The Special Presidential Adviser on Media and Publicity, Dr. Reuben Abati has stated that President Jonathan has taken interest in the case of a (Nigerian) pregnant factory worker, who was beaten by her Lebanese employer. The woman was said to have been (somehow) negligent in her duties (just for one day o!!!) and her boss (not considering her condition) pounced on her with kicks, punches and all other inhumane treatment. This resulted in her losing her 7 months old pregnancy and she is currently in Glorious Mercy Hospital.

Thanks to Doctor Abdulkareem, who treated her without any deposit (a good person biko!) and we also appreciate our president for giving hears to our cry #JusticeforAlice. This decision was contained in the tweets by Dr. R. Abati. See tweet after the cut.

Kidnapper | Rapist Caught With an Eight YO Girl Bleeding Through Her Private Part

A Report has reached us from IReporters TV that a suspected rapist in Lagos met his waterloo when he was accosted early yesterday morning by an angry crowd.

The man was said to be making an attempt to sneak away with an eight-year-old girl who he had just raped. The girl was reportedly bleeding from her vagina.

The suspect was intercepted along with his victim at about 8 a.m. yesterday around Akogun Street in the Olodi Apapa area of the state.

An eye witness said that the victim is in hospital presently undergoing treatment due to injuries she sustained from the rape.

The residents of Olodi Apapa were angered by the incident and they took justice into their own hands by beating the kidnapper half to death.

Watch video HERE.

'How I Raped Teenager to Death,' Culprit Confesses

This will definitely shock you peeps. The police (making us proud right now) has apprehended the culprits who raped a 12 YO girl to death. The victim was once declared missing by her parents, was raped to her untimely death by some heartless men you will read about shortly. One of the suspects actually lured the deceased to his house, raped her and dumped her remains in a well. How wicked human beings are! Read more below and also see photos...

The Police in Imo State, recently, rounded up the brain behind the death of a 12-year-old girl, Ifunanya Favour Iberi, who was declared wanted two months ago by arresting a 34-year-old man identified as Samuel Chukwunyere. Police alleged that the suspect was responsible for raping the teenager to death and dumping her lifeless body in a deep well.

The missing little Ifunanya was last seen by members of her family on Sunday, October 13, 2013, when she could not return to their house after her day’s routine activities. Apparently worried by the scaring development, her parents immediately alerted the Imo State Police Command. Their passionate appeal to the Commissioner of Police, Katsina was very simple. 'You must please, assist us find our missing daughter.'

Nigeria's First Lady Seeks Stiff Penalties against Rape

It has been reported that the First Lady, Dame Patience Jonathan, has called for stiff penalties, backed by effective laws for perpetrators of sexual violence against women.

Mrs Jonathan spoke in Paris, France on Friday, at the advocacy meeting on sexual violence against women. During the debate of child marriage in Nigeria, it can be recalled that Mrs Jonathan kept mute, but it's great to know she advocates against sexual #ViolenceagainstWomen *grin.*

The meeting was hosted by the First Lady of France, Ms Valerie Trierweiler, on the sideline of the Elysee Summit for Peace and Security in Africa holding in Paris.

U.S. Plans New Strategies to Check Violence against Women In #Nigeria

The United States government is planning new strategies to prevent and respond to violence against women in Nigeria.

At an event to commemorate the #16Days campaign on #ViolenceagainstWomen in Abuja on Tuesday, the Deputy Chief of Missions of the United States Embassy in Nigeria, Maria Brewer, described the rising cases of violence against women globally as worrisome.

In different works of art, students in the Federal Capital Territory depicted what violence against women meant to them, an unusual way adopted by the U.S. to commemorate the 2013 International Day Against Domestic Violence.

Inhumane! 64YO Man, 6 Others Remanded in Prison for Raping a 13YO in #Oyo

How can an elderly man and six other men be arrested and remanded in an Oyo prison following reports that they raped a young girl. Isn't that just inhumane? 

Emmanuel Abiola, 64, Mohammed Sanni, 35; Eze Ndubuisi, 26; Kabiru Mohammed 25; Sakiru Sokoto, 20; Mohammed Sefiu 21 and Mohammed Bashir, 19.

The six men were arraigned in a court sitting in Iyaganku which ordered that they be remanded at the Agodi Prison.

Survey Reveals Almost 3 in 10 Nigerians Claim to Know One Rape Victim

It is alarming that a survey conducted in January by NOI Polls revealed that almost 3 in 10 Nigerians admitted to personally knowing someone who has been a victim of rape; citing stigmatisation as the main reason why many rape cases go unreported. The poll which sampled over 500 Nigerians across the six geo-political zones of the country, also urged the government to create public awareness against rape. These were some of the findings from the latest poll results released by the Abuja-based opinion polling and research organisation.

In the light of the recent rape case in India, which has sparked widespread series of protests against rape across India and further campaigns for women’s rights in several countries, including Nigeria; NOI Polls has sought the opinion of Nigerians regarding the prevalence, and causes, of rape in the country, as well as solutions on how to curb the incidence of rape.