Straight from Habiba's Heart

We have been running various inspiring words from our inspiring and brave survivor Habiba Olawale (check HERE). This is another for y'all. Please listen to rape survivors when they need someone to talk to, hug them if they require it. Such acts might seem little but they go a long way in helping them heal. Read more...

It's not normal!

Do you have those conversations with you friends/family who in trying to say the right thing just say the wrong thing. I had a conversation today with one of them after a really tough therapy session and I was explaining how I was feeling, now it's actually not that often that I speak to them about it anymore, I just don't bother and just keep everything for my therapist and today I was reminded why!

#Nigeria: 72YO Man Remanded In Prison for Allegedly Raping 10YO Girl In #Osun

A Magistrate court in Osun State has ordered the remanding in prison custody of a 72-year-old man after he was alleged to have raped a 10-year-old girl.

Sunday Fakachuckwu, was ordered to be confined by the court sitting in Osogbo, the state capital over the allegations.

Leadership News reports:

The prosecutor, Insp. Wilson Meriti, told the court that Fakachuckwu, 72, committed the offence on October 10, at about 2 p.m., at Asejire, Apomu in Isokan local government area of Osun.Meriti added that the accused under the pretext of sending the “helpless” girl on an errand, lured her into his room where he unlawfully and indecently had carnal knowledge of her.He said the offence contravened Section 360 of the Criminal Code and Section 31(1) and (2) of Child’s Right Law of Osun 2007.Fakachuckwu pleaded not guilty to the charges.The Chief Magistrate, Mr Olusola Aluko, who ordered the remand of the accused, directed his Counsel, Mrs Bose Dada, to file a formal bail application on his behalf.Aluko adjourned the case to November 11, for mention

#Nigeria: 18YO Girl Commits Suicide After Being Raped in #Bayelsa

photo credit: NAN

When I said some victims commit suicide after a rape incident, people thought I was going over the board. Well, this is to clarify your doubts. This is the more reason we are passionate to keep on fighting. Those who raped this girl will be alive chilling somewhere, while the poor innocent child is gone. We must #EndRape! Read more...

According to Vanguard News, an 18-year-old girl, allegedly gang-raped by three boys, has committed suicide at her Amarata residence. It is a suburb of Yenagoa, the Bayelsa State capital.
The deceased, simply identified as Janet, was a native of Oduali in Abua/Odua Local Government Area of Rivers State.

She was reportedly gang-raped at gunpoint by the boys, who forced her into an uncompleted building last week, while she was on an errand for her elder sister.

A source said: “The girl was sad and devastated after the incident. After she narrated her experience, her sister’s husband, who is a pastor, asked her to describe any of her attackers. She described one of them.

“The boy was traced to his house, but he had absconded. The pastor counselled her and promised to pursue the matter to a logical conclusion.”

True Life Story: How I Was Brutally Raped By a Friend While Trying to Get a Job

From the source and the evidence, I can ascertain that this is true. The girl in question was brave enough to provide the required information even without been asked! The police report, their conversations on BBM, his pin and number. Funny enough the phone number is still on, as it was called on several occasions but no one picked up. Please find her story after below.


I am a rape victim and I want to tell my story to the world cos I want justice on the man that defiled me. I met him at airforce junction after I wrote a dragnet test at stadium road PH. He went on about how he was an aide to the governor of rivers state and that his name is (removed by me), a yoruba man and that he could help me with a job since I was from rivers state. we discussed about the recent happenings in the state. we exchanged pins and parted ways. I went back to lagos for business.

A month later, he calls me up that his oga wants to see me, smhow, his oga found out about me and would want to see me. I told him I wasn't around now and that I will call him when I came back to town (port-harcourt). I came back to PH on the 15th of October and called him, he said ok. On the 17th of October, he sent me a bbm chat saying hope I dnt mind seeing the oga this weekend, I replied that I don't, since I was free and besides I was job hunting so I saw this as a good opportunity to get a good job. Didn't hear from him that day. He sends me anoda bbm msg that they went for a function in abuja and he wl cal me when dy get back. 

How to Help a Rape Survivor Recover

               How To Help Someone Recover From A Rape or Sexual Assault:
Your friend or loved one has been attacked and violated in one of the most horrifying of ways. You feel powerless, angry, and unsure of what to do next.

Here are some tips for helping a loved one recover from a sexual assault:

                                             Right After The Sexual Assault:

Encourage your friend to see a doctor and receive proper medical attention after a sexual assault. He or she may need treatment for STDs or pregnancy testing after the assault.

Encourage - but do not pressure - your friend to report the attack. If your friend does not want to report the rape, respect that decision as his or hers to make.

                                                    Shortly After The Rape:

Listen, listen, listen to your friend who has been raped. He or she may try to go over and over the assault, replaying it in his or her mind. Listen without judgement as often as your friend would like.

Assure your loved one that he or she is not to blame for the rape. Expect to do this often as your loved one tries to work out why he or she was the victim of sexual assault.

Reassure your friend or loved one that you will be by their side no matter what. Your door is always open and you're always just a phone call away.

Reassure your loved one that no one "deserves" to be sexually violated or raped.

The Worrisome Growth of Rape Cases in #Nigeria

One major definition or should I say characteristic of news that is etched indelibly in my memory is that “when a dog bites a man, that is not news, because it happens so often. But if a man bites a dog, that is news.” This characteristic, as I was told, explains the need to avoid publishing recurrent issues as headlines so as not to bore the reader. Events that are not commonplace attract more audience than daily occurrences.

Personally, recurring news don’t tickle my fancy. And I’m sure there are many people whose attentions are not drawn by news articles they’ve read many times.

For a while now, cases of rape and all forms of sexual molestations, especially on innocent little girls have become widespread. Times there were when such cases roused many discussions and made the banner headlines of our newspapers. However, with the frequency of such cases, I’m afraid they have been consigned to the category of “dog bites man”. Having been overly reported, they only attract little readership. People now dismiss such news with a shrug of their shoulders as they have become commonplace and deserve no second thought.

More worrisome and heartbreaking is the fact that bizarre cases where renowned clergymen have unholy relationships with their church members (read) and fathers molest their children (Also read) now constitute the bulk of these cases. These cases are published but most times, we don’t get to hear anything concerning their outcomes.

#Nigeria: Edo Hospital Alone Records over 80 Rape Cases In Seven Months

In a recent news by Daily Post, a pathologist with Central Hospital, Benin said on Monday that the hospital recorded more than 80 cases of rape from March to mid-October.

Dr Jude Uchendu, a Consultant Pathologist in the Department of Pathology and Forensic Medicine in the hospital, made the disclosure in an interview with the News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) in Benin.

He said that more than 90 per cent of the cases were committed by people known by the victims with a significant number committed by neighbours or blood relations.

He said that only few were carried out by strangers, such as armed robbers and people who met the girls on the way and took them to uncompleted buildings.

Uchendu also said that some of the perpetrators of the crime were the girls’ fathers and caregivers.

“Between the month of March and October, we have interviewed over 80 patients and unfortunately, most of them are less than 18 years.

#Nigeria: My Uncle Raped Me of My Virginity! True Life Story

My name is "Courage" and I am 20 years old. I am a rape survivor and this is my story. In January 2012, I felt the biggest change was coming into my life, hmm... I was right but not as I presumed. My 'ex' uncle (as I would refer to him now) arrived in Nigeria and wanted me to travel abroad with him so I could further my education, to be honest, my mum was extremely sceptical about me going with him because she was trying to protect me from being abused (generally), my family and I later considered that I could go with him basically because he was staying with his wife and 5 years old son.

I felt I could be safe with him because he seemed to be a responsible man, in fact, he kept reminding me then that he had a child my age (from his previous marriage) so he considered me to be his daughter. From that moment, I took him as my dad and referred to him as 'daddy.' Months passed and my traveling processing was completed, I was overjoyed thinking I would finally get to purse my dreams of becoming a medical doctor. 

On the 5th of May 2012, I left Nigeria with him, the following day we got to the 'promise land' (as I referred to it then). We got to his house and I saw his wife and son, everything seemed perfect, I was of my best behavior so I had little or no issues with his wife. I even helped his little son with his academics and did all the house chores, did I mention anything about my school? NO! because nothing was done.

Heartbreaking! Bunmi Sobowale Took to Twitter to Share Her Rape Experience

Bunmi Sobowale @Bunmicake is someone a friend on Facebook had told me about. I didn't want to push her by asking her some questions, but I am glad she finally spoke out. Survivors have to learn the power in speaking out. It is in itself therapy. See more of her tweets after the cut.

Share Your Story with Us!

Hello everyone. Thanks for your support! If you are a rape survivor or if you know anyone who is, please share your/their story with us. We want to use your survival story to inspire others. We promise to be discreet if you need us to; we don't mind changing your name, location of incidence and other vital information. Please feel safe with us, we have your interest at heart always. Send your stories to ayodejiosowobi@gmail.com. We will be waiting to hear from you. 

Much love from all of us at Stand to End Rape/STER.

A Survivor Speaks Out: How I Left Lagos for Benin and Was Raped Repeatedly by a Trusted Male Friend

A friend of mine (names withheld) reached me and invited me to come to Benin City for an event. I have known him since 2011 so I thought nothing of it. Like no harm can be done after all we go way back and stuff. So I booked my ticket from Lagos and I flew to Benin. The event took place on the 13th, which was a Sunday and we went to a hotel in GRA Benin to chill afterwards. He had a Suite there. We were with other friends, we all talked, laughed, gisted and all until about 10 p.m. Everyone started leaving gradually, I wanted to call a cab to take me to my own hotel, but he kept on insisting on dropping me. I was like it is even better, I would save my cab fare.

So I had to wait for everybody to leave before he could drop me. Every body finally left and I was about to stand up to leave but he kept on insisting that I should stay and I kept on saying it was late that I have to travel back to Lagos the following day because of work.

Are You a Real Man?

The question why do (some) men rape has always been on mind. Is it to satisfy their sexual urge or just an act to punish women? Is it for revenge or an act of wickedness? Some of you rape to prove to yourselves that you are a man. Whatever the numerous reasons may be; indecent dressing, refusal of proposal and so on, no woman deserves to be raped.

Rape in its simplest form is a lifetime scar that stays on the survivor's mind. Rape makes the victim feel worthless. Even if they want to brush past it and move on with life, it is difficult sometimes when they think recollect the face of the man, who took advantage of them. Bravery sometimes cannot erase the voice of the rapist, which still lingers in one's head.

You might rape a girl today and think that's all about it, have you thought of the possibilities of the girl getting pregnant? Did you for one second think of your seed growing in the belly of a woman you raped? Will you be man enough in the future to tell your son/daughter how he or she was procreated? I guess not!

When some men realize their evil deed, they use the typical –– I am sorry. Do you just expect your "I'm sorry, it was the devil" speech to correct the past? Have you ever wondered if that victim ever survived the experience? Do you know if your action led to them committing suicide or going into (mental) depression? Will you be bold to say in future, "I was one of those who did what was right in my lifetime?" These are the questions I want you to think about the next time the thought to rape a girl comes to mind.

This might sound like a cliche, but I am very sure you remember 'karma.' Even if you don't eventually have a daughter, your son might. Imagine the hurt you will feel if someone took advantage of her (your daughter or granddaughter) and ruined her life. If you don't want your daughter, daughter-in-law or grandchild's life to be ruined, I suggest you don't ruin others'.

If you take pleasure in raping a girl, be warned and please desist from such acts. 

Will Castrating Rapists Help to End Rape in #Nigeria?

This topic is controversial but sounds really interesting and fascinates me a lot! How about castration being a punishment for rapists. Wouldn't it just make the world a better place? Lol!

Rape, a form of sexual violence, is a word no sane woman wants to hear let alone experience. Even as a man, I loath rapists with a passion which degree I can’t find enough words to describe.

There was a girl who needed much convincing to drop her plans to commit suicide following a gang-rape by 3 men led by someone she considered a “big brother.” Her pains I just couldn't imagine when she expressed her agonies and the deep seated anger against the perpetrators of the dastardly act.

Her pains she said, was multiplied because she could not muster courage to report the issue to the police as she was sure the tide would be turned against her when the issue would get into full swing.

#Nigeria: Man Abducts and Rapes Woman for Three Years

The Lagos State Police Command said it has arrested a 37-year-old man for abducting and raping a 30-year-old woman for three years.

The suspect, Idowu Ajibola was paraded alongside three other suspects who specialise in kidnapping little boys in Lagos and Ogun states.

Idowu who was arrested by police attached to the Area ‘E’ Command in Festac town, was said to have abducted Modupe Brown under mysterious circumstance.

It was gathered that Brown was a 400 Level student of Business Administration at the Lagos State University, LASU, when she was abducted and kept incommunicado with her family for three years.

#Nigeria: 30YO Bags Three-Month Jail Term over Rape of Minor

I firmly do not support sentencing a sexual offender to a three months jail term. How will this judgement deter others from engaging in raping a girl child? How come murderers get more severe punishment for their acts while rapists get mere punishment? In order to fight rape in our society, we need stringent laws.

A Zone 2 Wuse Magistrates’ Court in Abuja last week, sentenced Seyi Balogun, 30, of Zehidu Village, Lugbe, Abuja, to three months in prison for sexually assaulting a minor.

The Senior Magistrate, Mrs. Grace Adebayo-Eisape, sentenced Balogun without an option of fine.

Adebayo-Sisape condemned the action of the convict and said the sentence was to deter others.

#Nigeria: Butcher, 27, Jailed for 4 Years for Raping Minor

An Upper Area Court in Mararaba, Nasarawa State, three days ago, sentenced a 27-year-old butcher, Mu’azu Lawali, to four years imprisonment for raping a minor.

The presiding officer, Vincent Gwehemba, did not give the convict an option of fine.

The convict, who lives in Angwan Ganda Masaka, was arraigned for having unlawful carnal knowledge of an 11-year-old girl.

The prosecutor, Inspector Joseph Ahua, told the court that the matter was reported by the victim’s parents at Masaka Police Station on October 4.

Ahua said the convict confessed to committing the offence, which contravened Section 283 of the Penal Code.

“Whoever has carnal intercourse against the order of nature with any man, woman or animal shall be punished with imprisonment for a term which may extend to 14 years and shall also be liable to fine,” the Penal Code reads.

The accused, however, pleaded guilty to the charge.

Culled from: News24 Nigeria

#Nigeria –– THE EVIL THAT MEN DO! Stand to #EndRape

She was just a young innocent girl, she was 18. Her fault some people say is her decision to obey her parents by getting ordinary garri (food) for the whole family in the night. SHE WAS A GIRL.

Eight men gang raped her one by one and then strangled her neck, and also used hammer and nail to pierce her vagina. They left her to die in by a bush path, spreading her legs wide! Wounded! Exposed! Her body was discovered in the early hours of the morning after a thorough search was conducted through out the night. What’s more is that when she was discovered, it was a horrible site, as no one could look at the nails in her body. 

She was confirmed dead already and no one at the crime scene could hold back tears. Not to worry, she wasn't your sister nor your daughter,  but she could have been. The brutality has to stop right here guys. Rapists deserve capital punishment for their cruel, they just succeed in wasting another girl's life through perverted acts. She died on Friday, 5th October 2013. 

Rest in Peace♥ and we pray that her killers get the WORST punishment possible. This doesn't only happen in Anambra State, but in most states and countries around the world. Is this how we treat our women? It's saddening to live in a world where the vulnerable ones are easily exploited. If her death hurts you, join the movement to Stand to #EndRape.

Culled from: Facebook

#Nigeria –– Alarming! Gombe Records 61 Rape Cases in 36 Months

The Programme Coordinator, Centre for Community Health and Development, Mrs Lucy Usein, said 61 rape cases had been recorded in Gombe State in the last three years.

Usein made this known at a news conference organised by a non-governmental organisation, Child Protection Network, in Gombe, on Tuesday.

She said 14 cases were reported to the organisation in 2011, 26 cases in 2012 and 21 cases so far in 2013.

“These are the only ones that are reported; there are many cases and because of fear of stigmatisation, parents do not like the matter to be treated in public,” she said.

Polls Reveals; #Nigerians Believe Rape is Caused by Indecent Dressing

So I was supposed to have posted this yesterday, but due to the large amount of articles I have (thanks to my beautiful readers who have been sending in articles), it's coming up today. *wink

A poll carried out revealed that a large amount of Nigerians believe the alarming rate of rape cases in the country is caused by girls indecent dressing.

Polls revealed:

“In order to commemorate this event and honour the girl child this special day, NOI Polls Limited released one of the polls we conducted in the first quarter of the year 2013, which was focused on the challenges faced by the girl child in Nigeria and indeed the world over as a result of the incidence of rape among women in the society. 34 percent of the participants believed that indecent dressing was the main cause of rape in the society; 18 percent believed unemployment was the cause; nine percent believed it was caused by lack of moral values and another nine percent believed it was caused by the inability to control sexual urges; seven percent said it was caused by faulty upbringing. Five percent of the participants believed rape was caused by illiteracy about women’s rights, ungodliness and bad company."

What do you guys think?

Culled from: Ok gist

#Nigeria –– A Court in #Makurdi Remands Applicant in Prison

A Makurdi Magistrates’ Court on Wednesday remanded an applicant, Daniel Iorkua, 26, in prison over an allegation that he raped an 11-year-old girl.

Iorkua, who lived in Nyon Layout, Gboko Road, was ordered to be remanded in prison custody after the court heard the prosecution.

The prosecuting police officer, Inspector Moses Akoo, told the court that one Terna Fakaa had reported the case at the State Criminal Investigation Department, Makurdi, on September 20, 2013.

He said that the complainant stated that the accused, who was his neighbour, forcefully had sexual intercourse with his 11-year-old ward.