Tuesday, October 29, 2013

A Survivor #SpeaksOut: I was Raped By 7 Men in #Nigeria



We have been asking that people share their survival stories with us (check HERE), some people have reached out and we hope their stories will isnpire you. Habiba is one of those. Read more...

I never thought that I would do this. I mean I don't like talking about this. I guess you might want to hear the story first. Of course, afterwards you'll know why I feel this way. Thank you @AyodejiOsowobi for letting me tell my story.

Hello, I am Habiba, I am not really sure how I should start. It has taken me a long time to convince myself to tell someone my story. I am doing this because I believe it will help anyone who has gone through something similar to accept that it was not their fault and help them move on. Well, this is the story of a rape survivor.

The incident: 

It happened when I was 13. I was walking home from a friend's house after a tutorial class and suddenly, a car pulled up beside me. Four guys about college age or older jumped out of the car and pulled me in. While in the car, they punched me in the face and choked me with one of their belts.

After a while, they pulled off the road and into a field where they dragged me out of the car, and kept on hitting me. They kicked me in the ribs over and over, and shoved dirt down my mouth. Then they tied my arms behind my back and my feet to small trees so my legs were spread apart. I knew what they were going to do and I fought as hard as I could, but they just kept hitting me. All four raped me and did as much damage as they could possibly do.

Afterwards they got back in their car and left, I had been unconscious long before it was over. I woke up in the hospital a few days later, I had severe internal damage. Although my father was outraged, my mother told me that I should just pretend that it never happened, not to press charges or even try to find who the guys were. Hmmmmm!

Fast forward and we are a few years down the line. By some cruel trick or twist of fate, I was set up to be raped by a friend. God, I really hope this helps somebody. I don't even know how it happened. I was drugged in my own room and 3 guys had their way with me.

Today physically I've made a full recovery, but emotionally I am still shaky. I have attempted suicide several times, life can't possibly be any worse. I cry every night for hours on end, I just need to be redeemed. I mean “Who is going to pay for this?”

Recovery:

Some of the things that see me through each day are MY HOLY BOOK, the music by Whitney Houston titled ‘Greatest Love of All’ , ‘Each Tear’ by Mary .J. Bilge and  'Stronger' by Kelly Clarkson. These three songs have made me realize that it is okay to be angry.

My mother and siblings have helped me accept who I am and what has happened to me. Thank you Mummy, you are the best mom ever :D, Mind you, this is how I found the Peace in me. I love listen to the radio. Thanks to my big aunty and friend, INYA ODE she made me to 'Forgive All My Rapists.' She worked with a radio station in the Federal Capital Territory, and it was in 2011 or 2012, I think. The show was called, SundayMelodies and her topic that day was all about forgiveness. She was so happy then, but she never Knew I Am a Rape Survivor. 

Yes, I still have anger, resentment, hatred, disgust and everything else that one can have over what happened to me. I am so glad that some of you have found that peace. I am still working to get there and I know that one day I will find that peace by the grace of God. I have realized now that indeed I WAS A VICTIM but IT WAS NOT MY FAULT. I have a long journey ahead of me. I know my mess will always be a message to so many people.

After crying to set myself free, I decided to forgive everyone who has hurt me one way or the other, including my Father who abandoned me and my mother for 15years, when everything happened. 

Thanks aunty, God bless your generation. Thanks to every survivor out there who has shared their story. The likes of @Bunmicake have helped me so much even just by helping me know there are others like me. Be strong and God bless you.

I dedicate this survivor story to my beloved twin sister, she is late now and I pray her soul continues to rest in peace.

Words on Marble:

IF YOU ARE A RAPE SURVIVOR, PLEASE LET GO OF ALL THE PAINS. IT WASN'T YOUR FAULT...

So guys, we will be having a tweet session with @Abdulhabiba12 soonest, so please follow our twitter handle @AyodejiOsowobi and stay tuned to hear her speak more about this issue.

13 comments:

  1. Bunmi Sobowale11:04:00 AM

    You are not a VICTIM dearie,YOU are a SURVIVOR like me,You are a WINNER,and nothing can STOP who GOD has called you to BE.YOU are a MOVING TRAIN and you are UNSTOPPABLE.You are also a TESTIMONY.I want you to KNOW that no MATTER what you are GOING THROUGH,remember GOD is only USING you.This BATTLE is not YOURS,its GOD own.As for the EMOTION part,God will HEAL you ONE day at a TIME.*Hugssssss*.

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    Replies
    1. @Bunmi, thanks for being an inspiration to her. Survivors helping survivors! Thank you!

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  2. I am so glad that you were bold enough to tell your story. Do not forget that God has a purpose for your life and no matter what happens in the course of your journey, you must be courageous! God bless you Habiba. From STER, we love and will always stand by you. Cheers.

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  3. The future is bright. Hear the word of the lord I know the plans I have for you,the plans of good and not of evil.your best days are still ahead of you.

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    1. Thanks for the encouraging words. Please keep visiting our blog and also invite your friends. We appreciate you for standing up for rape survivors.

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  4. Anonymous2:03:00 AM

    Hmmmmmmm!! I am speechless right now....but u see my darlyn,I understand the hurt. One thing u must keep telling urself is u did nothing wrong but are a victim. I admire ur courage, resilience, fearlessness and strength. Many women are still hiding but u have come out- that take a large dose of COURAGE and it shows that the healing process has truly begun. Keep ur head up and shoulders high sista!! God is on ur side and His grace is sufficient for u. I love u so much Habiba and I'm grateful to God for making me a vessel to facilitate the healing process. Keep growing in strength sista and God's mercy will speak for u. Let them go so u have them living in ur heart rent free. Forgiveness isn't easy BUT MUST be done for our SANITY. Keep on keeping on. My prayers are with u always!!!

    Nuff Said......Inya!!!!

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    Replies
    1. We truly appreciate you taking time to visit our blog and also commenting on our post. Your words are uplifting and inspiring, we appreciate it. She is now working with our team to #EndRape. Please keep visiting our blog and also invite your friends. God bless you!

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  5. Great WORK ... I salute your courage... You have my support all the way! This Evil MUST STOP!

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    1. Thanks for encouraging her. She is now working with our team to #EndRape. Thanks for your comment.

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  6. @Bunmi You are a GREAT Inspiration to many including myself... @Ayo.. God Bless u !!!

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    1. We are glad she is inspiring other survivors. Thanks for appreciating our work, we won't relent! God bless.

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  7. Anonymous2:59:00 PM

    Pathetic, but courageous, Habiba's story. I commend you, Habiba, for speaking out. I sincerely believe speaking out against this bestial act is one step towards unmasking personalities behind the masquerade. vigorous campaigns for stiffer law against on rape by the government will go a long way to reduce the increasing incidence of rape across the Nigeria in particular, and the world at large. Step up the awareness.
    -Cyril

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  8. Anonymous1:20:00 PM

    @Habiba and every other survivor out there, God has better plans for your lives, He will definitely take you beyond your dreams. Loads of love.

    NY

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