Shame: Poem by Tosin Adeshokan (@theOluwatosin)

SHAME


The child heavy with child.
Spited by her mates,
Shallow bastards that wouldn’t know any better.
Disgraced by the community,
Shamed by her family.
She won’t find the cure to cancer.
That future is now erased.
All she would ever be would be street fights and failed marriages.
Drugs and suicide attempts.
One day she gets lucky and kills herself,
Trying to drown the Indian movie of sadness her life has become.


But do not shame Shade
No No No! Don’t even dare!


Shame her father for being a pig!
It’s not his fault he can’t respect women!
Just like his father before him, he is a violent abusive drunk!


Shame her mother for not standing against hell she called marriage.
A fractured nose here, a non-operational black eye there.
Settling for someone beneath her because society says ‘A woman is a failure if she isn’t married’.

Losing Your Virginity to Rape

Being raped, regardless of the circumstances, is always traumatic. Losing your virginity to rape can add an extra layer of pain to an already horrific experience. A person’s virginity can be precious to them in many ways and the impact of its loss through rape can be particularly devastating.

Loss

The losing of your virginity has always been significant within most cultures and in today’s society it has become an important rite of passage. Choosing to lose your virginity is seen as an important life event and in western society it plays a large role in many films, T.V. shows and books. If you have lost your virginity to rape then you have been cheated out of making this important choice for yourself and that is a huge loss.

Anyone who has been raped will experience a sense of loss over what happened to them. Being raped can make a person feel that they have lost a part of themselves as well as feeling a loss of control over what happened to their body. Adding the loss of your virginity to this can feel really overwhelming. The loss can be so much bigger than just physically losing your virginity. Many people hold onto their virginity with the hope that they will one day be able to give it to someone special. Some may have been keeping it for their husband or wife, while others may have been waiting for the right person to come into their lives. Whatever you were waiting for, having your virginity taken from you through rape also means that you loose this dream.

"I Was Raped 13 Years Ago, But It's Time to Break the Silence," says BIDEMI

It's very important that more and more people #SpeakOut. Sharing your story is a step towards getting your healing... Today on the blog, I will be sharing the story of a lady, who was abused 13 years ago and yet relives the incident in her head daily.

Bidemi says her rapist ''OLUKUNLE KOLEOSO IS NOW A CUSTOMS OFFICER WHO HAS BEEN EMPOWERED WITH A UNIFORM AND A GUN, THE THOUGHT OF WHAT HE possibly CAN DO WITH IT SENDS SHRILL DOWN MY SPINES.''

She said watching my Moments With Mo session helped her find her voice... She sent this to me and I thought I should share this (with her permission of course).

Read more below...